Just LoL

17 Mistakes to spot in the Harry Potter movies

2011-07-18T13:36:00.000-07:00

USA in 15 pictures

2011-07-14T10:59:00.000-07:00

I hate my job

2011-07-12T12:11:00.000-07:00

Crazy Cats

2011-07-10T06:23:00.000-07:00

We need to talk about this

2011-07-09T08:34:00.001-07:00

Jokes about bankers

2011-07-09T08:31:00.000-07:00

If you owe the bank $100, that's your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that's the bank's problem.

Einstein dies and goes to heaven only to be informed that his room is not yet ready. "I hope you will not mind waiting in a dormitory. We are very sorry, but it's the best we can do and you will have to share the room with others" he is told by the doorman.

Einstein says that this is no problem at all and that there is no need to make such a great fuss. So the doorman leads him to the dorm. They enter and Albert is introduced to all of the present inhabitants. "See, Here is your first room mate. He has an IQ of 180!"
"That's wonderful!" says Albert. "We can discuss mathematics!"

"And here is your second room mate. His IQ is 150!"
"That's wonderful!" says Albert. "We can discuss physics!"

"And here is your third room mate. His IQ is 100!"
"That's wonderful! We can discuss the latest plays at the theater!"

Just then another man moves out to capture Albert's hand and shake it. "I'm your last room mate and I'm sorry, but my IQ is only 80."
Albert smiles back at him and says, "So, where do you think interest rates are headed?"

At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl. Immediately he began paying her court and flattering her outrageously. The girl liked the young man, but she was taken a bit aback by his fast and ardent pitch. She was amazed when after 30 minutes he seriously proposed marriage.

"Look," she said. "We only met a half hour ago. How can you be so sure? We know nothing about each other."

"You're wrong," the young man declared. "For the past 5 years I've been working in the bank where your father has his account."

A young banker decided to get his first tailor made suit. So he went to the finest tailor in town and got measured for a suit. A week later he went in for his first fitting. He put on the suit and he looked stunning, he felt that in this suit he can do business.

As he was preening himself in front of the mirror he reached down to put his hands in the pockets and to his surprise he noticed that there were no pockets. He mentioned this to the tailor who asked him, "Didn't you tell me you were a banker?"

The young man answered, "Yes, I did."

To this the tailor said, "Who ever heard of a banker with his hands in his own pockets?"

Pictures Disney never wanted you to see

2010-07-07T08:27:00.000-07:00

The life of nails

2010-07-06T03:41:00.000-07:00

Squirrels Gone Wild!

2010-07-05T07:26:00.000-07:00

A few jokes

2010-07-04T11:35:00.000-07:00

Bank customer service

"I'm not saying that the customer service in my bank is bad, but when I went in the other day and asked the clerk to check my balance ... she leaned over and pushed me."

Buy machine factory

An American manufacturer is showing his machine factory to a potential customer from Albania. At noon, when the lunch whistle blows, two thousand men and women immediately stop work and leave the building.

"Your workers, they're escaping!" cries the visitor. "You've got to stop them."

"Don't worry, they'll be back," says the American. And indeed, at exactly one o'clock the whistle blows again, and all the workers return from their break.

When the tour is over, the manufacturer turns to his guest and says, "Well, now, which of these machines would you like to order?"

"Forget the machines," says the visitor. "How much do you want for that whistle?"

A walking economy

This guy is walking with his friend, who happens to be a psychologist. He says to this friend, "I'm a walking economy."

The friend asks, "How so?"

"My hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and both of these together are putting me into a deep depression!"

Wealthy investors

A wealthy investor walked into a bank and said to the bank manager, "I would like to speak with Mr. Reginald Jones, who I understand is a tried and trusted employee of yours."

The banker said, "Yes he certainly was trusted. And he will be tried as soon as we catch him."

Funny Tea Bags

2009-08-26T11:33:00.001-07:00

These tea bags are produced in Germany. They depict different famous people: politicians, celebrities and even the British royal family!

Ten things Bill Gates would like to change about the automotive industry

2009-08-11T13:05:00.001-07:00

10. New seats would require everyone to have the same body size.

9. We'd all have to switch to Microsoft Gas.

8. The U.S. government would get subsidies from an automaker--a first.

7. The oil, alternator, gas, and engine warning lights would be replaced by a single "General Car Fault" warning light.

6. Sun Motorsystems would make a car that was solar-powered, twice as reliable, five times as fast, but ran on only 5% of the roads.

5. You would be constantly pressured to upgrade your car.

4. You could have only one person in the car at a time, unless you bought Car 95 or CarNT - but then you would have to buy more seats.

3. Occasionally your car would die for no apparent reason and you would have to restart it. Strangely, you would just accept this as normal.

2. Every time the lines on the road were repainted, you'd have to buy a new car.

1. People would get excited about the new features of Microsoft cars, forgetting that the same features had been available from other carmakers for years.

Proof that Bill Gates is the Devil

2009-08-11T13:02:00.000-07:00

Proof that Bill Gates is the Devil
The real name of "the" Bill Gates is William Henry Gates III. Nowadays he is known as Bill Gates (III), where "III" means the order of third (3rd.)

By converting the letters of his current name to the ASCII-values and adding his (III), you get the following:

B 66
I 73
L 76
L 76
G 71
A 65
T 84
E 69
S 83
+ 3
--------------
666 !!

Some might ask, "How did Bill Gates get so powerful?" Coincidence? Or just the beginning of mankind's ultimate and total enslavement???

Before you decide, consider the following:

M S - D O S 6 . 2 1
77+83+45+68+79+83+32+54+46+50+49 = 666

W I N D O W S 9 5
87+73+78+68+79+87+83+57+53+1 = 666

Coincidence? You decide...

Reasons Why Windows Is Not A Virus

2009-08-11T13:00:00.000-07:00

Reasons Why Windows Is Not A Virus

1. Viruses are free.

2. Viruses don't take up most of your hard drive.

3. Viruses don't need 80 megs of RAM.

4. Viruses don't have major bugs.

5. Viruses don't have three different sets of documentation.

6. Viruses don't leak info to the press about the upcoming Jerusalem 95, to keep people from switching to Michelangelo/2 Warp.

7. Viruses aren't on every computer.

8. Nobody cares if a virus turns out to be 16 bit, even though it is advertised as 32...

9. Viruses install themselves !

10 Reasons It Would Rule to Date a Unicorn

2009-08-11T11:13:00.000-07:00

Most Unusual Swimming Pools

2009-08-09T10:29:00.000-07:00

What (not) to do in case of a nuclear attack

2009-08-07T09:15:00.000-07:00

Guide for Tag Removals

2009-08-06T07:45:00.001-07:00

Don`t use this in the store! Use it only if they forget to remove the tag, so you have to do it by yourself.

- You will need:

1) A very strong magnet. In everyday life the strongest magnet you can get is the magnet from the computer’s Hard Drive. You can usually get one non-working disk from some computer store who sells used hardware. It would cost you dollar or two.

The magnet itself is glued to the surface - you need to insert the blade between the magnet and the disk and then you have a magnet!

One magnet might be not enough, you gotta get a few of such for best results. But beware - anything magnetically - sensitive like credit card or small electronic devices should be taken away from it - or it can be easily harmed!

So when you have the magnets put them one to another (like in the picture).

Now take the item.

That’s NOT right way to put it.

And that’s right way to do it!

Airline Safety Procedures Parody

2009-08-05T02:35:00.000-07:00

What is this anyway?

Parodied airline safety cards! During my college days back in '99 I was on a flight somewhere when I realized that the safety instructions in front of me had no captions. I thought to myself, "why is that guy's life jacket dispensing red licorice?!" So I decided to add some captions to the emergency evacuation instruction placards that everyone who flies the friendly skies is familiar with. I showed them to my pals, and they loved them! I hope you do too!

Logistics FAIL

2009-08-04T01:37:00.000-07:00

Nuns goofin off

2009-08-02T11:00:00.001-07:00

Worst fictional character costumes ever

2009-07-31T04:53:00.001-07:00

Kepping a clean car is hard work

2009-07-18T04:57:00.000-07:00

Yoga for Drunks

2009-07-17T04:36:00.001-07:00

Funny garage door mural stickers

2009-07-16T01:31:00.001-07:00

Russian Haired Sausage

2009-07-15T02:21:00.001-07:00

Refrigerator Disasters

2009-07-14T06:32:00.000-07:00

Santa Fails!

2009-07-13T07:18:00.001-07:00

Hilariously Random Google Suggest Screenshots

2009-07-12T03:56:00.001-07:00

There I Fixed It

2009-07-10T08:51:00.000-07:00

Explain This Image

2009-07-09T09:00:00.001-07:00

Crazy Asian Idol

2009-07-08T06:45:00.000-07:00

A Jet from Cigarette

2009-07-05T05:43:00.000-07:00

Funny Signs and What They Mean

2009-07-04T06:58:00.001-07:00

Funny Kids

2009-07-03T09:09:00.000-07:00

Animals Armed With Lightsaber

2009-07-02T11:15:00.000-07:00

15 Cool Cell Phone Concepts From The Future

2009-07-01T10:02:00.001-07:00

12 Amazing Pencil Sculptures

2009-06-03T10:39:00.001-07:00

A South African-born, Massachusetts-based artist, Jennifer Maestre is known for her unique pencil sculptures. She derives most of her inspiration from the form and texture of the sea urchin. Skillfully crafted from hundreds and hundreds of colored pencils, they're cut into one inch pieces, sharpened and then drilled through to become beads, and then sewn together using a peyote stitch. In each of these incredible works you can feel the approach-avoid paradox from her medium --a clear and surprising achievement (and one of her goals). Meet some of her best artworks below.

15 Most Bizarre Patents

2009-05-23T12:20:00.000-07:00

1. Ladies Underwear with Calendar (US 5606748)

Just in case you happen to forget your period, this underwear will keep you posted. This is how it works: at the front waistband of this feminine undergarment, a clip holding band is equipped by sewing horizontal and vertical threads in a grid form, and below the clip holding band, a date portion is located in which numerals and heart shapes are printed in two lines. Both edges of the clip holding band are designed to be sewn as to extend from the date portion. At first, a gold heart-shaped clip is hooked on the right end portion and a silver heart-shaped clip is hooked on the left end of the clip holding band with a vertical pin and a horizontal pin. Moving the clip on to the clip holding band above the date of the date portion below and allowing the vertical pin tip end to protrude from the clip holding band enables the clip to indicate the date below. This enables the recording of the date when the period began and allows for the computation of the time until the next period begins. Specially designed for forgetful ladies.

2. Anti-eating face mask (US 4344424)

Tired of trying to go on a diet and failing every time? The Mouth Cage is the solution for you. Designed to allow you to breath and speak but not eat due to the food barrier that's mounted on your face, the Mouth Cage is actually locked onto your head, so you can't cheat the system. Quite a subtle way to lose weight.

3.Bird diaper (US 5934226)

Tired of cleaning your bird's little presents? This "bird diaper" features an enclosed pouch for receiving and containing excrement, and apertures to accommodate both the wings and the tail of the bird. Beat that!

4. Automatic Bed Maker (US 4441222)

Sick of making the bed every day? Well now you don't need to! You can use this electrically-operated bed cover making apparatus secured to the frame of a bed and operable to cause a framework carrying a plurality of arms to be lifted from the foot of the bed to the head by utilizing a pair of rotating wheels on either side of the bed frame. How awesome is that?

5. Cheese-Filter Cigarette (US 3234948)

If you are looking for a new smoking experience, perhaps what you need is a flavorful cheese filtered cigarette. According to its inventor, "current" cigarette filters (circa 1966) don't filter enough tar and nicotine from tobacco smoke, so he "discovered" a new one: cheese! He insists it makes a "very efficient tobacco filter."

6. Forehead Rest For Urinals (US 6681419)

Many of us, no doubt, have found ourselves kneeling down before the porcelain god, reflecting on the events that brought us there. Usually, these moments result in some sort of vow that our lives will be different if we can just get through the unfortunate experience at hand. For many, however, kneeling is not an option. Often this has nothing to do with irreverence, it is simply a practical concern for the balance and agility needed to navigate our way down to the floor in a highly altered state. For these people we recommend doing their holiday imbibing at public establishments equipped with U.S. patent 6,681,419, a forehead rest strategically installed against a wall above a bathroom commode or urinal or beneath a showerhead .

Thanks to this handy little device you'll steady yourself by simply resting your forehead in the appropriately bowing down position required of your shameful state.

7. The Bionic Golfer

Strap yourself in and hang on tight… it's going to be a wild ride, you'll get no gentle guidance from a golf pro with this device. The T3 Bionic Golfer grabs and holds your shoulders, arms, waist and legs, giving it total control over your girly golf swing. The T3 is designed to help you improve your swing with firm guidance and features a hip gripping padded saddle and a vest with a rigid back plate.

So make your move, back up and lock-in to the T3. Now go ahead and try to relax during your swing, we dare you. And that swing better be good, or you may just be locked into this thing until you get it right!

8. Instant Face Lift (US 4995379)

Got a hot date but your face features a few flawed folds? Try this sophisticated, do-it-yourself Instant Face Lift. It's easy and "fun" to apply the anchor band # A to your scalp by parting your hair and squeezing on some surgical adhesive. Next, glue tabs 3 and 4 to areas that need a little extra stretch and pull the tensioned straps tight for that home-made lifted look.

The inventor suggests: "to make the device as inconspicuous as possible, the elements are either completely transparent or flesh color". We are not sure no one will notice that little clear adhesive blob stuck to your face with a strap running into your hair.

9. Amusement Urinal (US 4773863)

So here's the idea: a urinal with amusement features. Discouraging the inadvertent or intentional diversion of urine outside the proper receptacle, urine is detected by pressure or temperature sensors 12, sending an electrical signal to a control unit 16. This activates a loudspeaker 28 and video screen 24, to provide audio and visual signals. The combination of sight and sound may be varied by the user upon proper direction of the urine stream, and the user is actively involved in his own amusement. Is like Disneyworld for your member.

10. Motorized Ice-cream Cone (US 5971829)

This is a novelty amusement eating receptacle for supporting, rotating and sculpting a portion of ice cream or similarly malleable food while it is being consumed comprising: a hand-held housing, a cup rotatable supported by the hand-held housing and adapted to receive and contain a portion of ice cream or food product of similar consistency, and a drive mechanism in the hand-held housing for imparting rotation upon the cup and rotationally feeding its contents against a person's outstretched tongue. Of course it is impossible to think that someone might be able to just rotate a regular cone as they lick the ice-cream.

11. Banana Protection Device (US 6612440)

This banana protective device includes a container having a first cover member and a second cover member being hingedly attached to the first cover member and being adapted to store a banana therein; and also includes pad members being securely disposed upon the first and second cover members for protecting and cushioning the banana; and further includes fastening members being attached to the first and second cover members for fastenably closing the first and second cover members together.

12. Sound Muffler for Covering the Mouth (US 4834212)

Meet the "Sound Muffler," a device into which a person may yell or scream without disturbing others, allowing him to vent built-up anger and frustration. The interior of the muffler is coated with foam. A microphone can be included to pick up a some sound and activate a light display or meter giving the user immediate visual feedback as to the intensity of sound produced.

13. Emoticon keyboard (US 6629793)

We can create emoticons (such as smileys) with keyboards by combining various keys to form a big grin, a sad face, and so on. But what if you had a keyboard system with a different key for every emoticon? This invention includes a keyboard with keys representing emoticons and abbreviations; a keyboard processor that produces enhanced scan codes in order to create the emoticons on your screen; a keyboard driver for interfacing with the keyboard; and an application that receives the emoticons or abbreviations determined by the keyboard driver.

14. Eating utensil (US 4809435)

So this is an "eating utensil" which, when used, resembles chopsticks, but which does not require the skilled manipulation of them. Instead, the utensil includes a pair of handles and resembling chopsticks that converge toward their distal ends, where they are secured to a food-engaging member, such as fork tines, a spoon, or other Western-style utensil. Or... you can just use the fork and get it over with.

15. Dog Ear Protector (US 4233942)

This invention provides a device for protecting the ears of animals, especially long-haired dogs, from becoming soiled by the animal's food while the animal is eating. The tubular shaped member would contain and protect of the animal's ear, and a member to position the tubular member and animal ears away from the mouth and food of the animal while it is eating.

Dumbest Car Spoilers

2009-05-22T08:41:00.000-07:00

The art of cropping

2009-04-04T06:29:00.000-07:00

Sweet, right? Wrong!

Only in China

2009-02-23T08:40:00.000-08:00

Funny Signs

2009-01-13T11:34:00.001-08:00

15 Most Unfortunate Haircuts for a Mugshot

2009-01-11T11:48:00.000-08:00

Wind versus Miniskirts

2009-01-10T12:36:00.001-08:00

Hilarious Tombstones

2008-12-07T09:06:00.000-08:00

Air Time!

2008-12-06T06:24:00.000-08:00

The Mario Room

2008-11-14T10:17:00.000-08:00